North Portland Santacon (NoPDX Anticon) Date & Information | 2009

North Portland Santacon 2008
North Portland Santacon 2008
Taken On December 6, 2008 at 2.23pm PST
Photo By Squid Vicious

There was quite the controversy or rather misdirection last year about whether Santacon was in downtown or Hillsboro. Regardless of what happened, Antion definitely took place in North Portland. Description from Squid Vicious:

It started out slow but that could of been because everyone was arriving by max. Last years downtown Santacon had a buzz about it, and it was a crazy buzz. This years NorthPDX Santacon had some very familliar faces along with a friend feel to it. The crowd was a couple hundred deep and everyone liked being in a different part Portland.

Related Info and Events:

Press release info from this year's North Portland Santacon / NoPDX Anticon after the break…

So here it is, officially with permission from PDXAnticon.

We will have more information by the end of the week.
For now all you need is 12:30 on 12/5 at the Paul Bunyan.
Most stops will be by or near the Yellow line.

We are trying to get Santa's to bring ‘yard art' with them…. Just something to leave a trail of were Santa has been in NoPo or maybe to decorate some of the neighborhoods celebrities.
Be scared famous people!

IN A NUTSHELL
This is for adults – where guys & girls of legal age dress up like Santa and go cavorting around town for no better reason than that it's huge fun.

ADVICE FROM SANTA
It's a good idea to have someone's cell number in case you get lost from the group or need to find a meetup point at an off-time. Network with other santas and get their numbers ahead of time.
Pay with Cash! – Just imagine if you're a bartender trying to keep up with dozens of tabs and everyone looks like Santa. It'll make life easier for you too because you won't have to tab out when it comes time to leave. Some of the places on Santa's list might be very quick stops – 1 hour or less – so running a tab will lead to time being wasted or you being left behind.

FAQ
Q: What is this?
A: This is your opportunity to be Santa!
Q: Is this some kind of political statement?
A: No. It's fun and only fun.
Q: Who's in charge?
A: Santa.

THE FOUR F**KS:
1. Don't f**k with kids
2. Don't f**k with cops
3. Don't f**k with security
4. Don't f**k with Santa. (it's okay to f**k Santa)

Note: “f**k” is used here in place of the word “f**k”
We have done this because we were concerned that visitors to the site might be offended by the use of the word “f**k” explicitly.

RULES:

1. Santa does not make children cry. Really, if you see kids, don't do anything to freak them out. Give them a nice smile and possibly a gift of some kind (toys, candy etc). Parents and tourists are a different matter altogether – adjust based on their attitude.
2. Santa dresses for all occasions. It's December. Smart santas wear multiple costume layers. Dress to maximize merriment whether singing Christmas carols in the snow, or swinging from a stripper pole in a hot nightclub.
3. Santa doesn't whine! We will be outside a lot and commuting mainly on foot – bring enough “snacks” to keep your pie-hole filled until we get indoors.
4. Bring gifts: NAUGHTY gifts to give grown ups; NICE stuff to give kids. Throwing coal at people is discouraged no matter who they are. YES THAT INCLUDES POLITICIANS. But giving out coal might actually be appreciated.
5. Watching santa get drunk and rowdy is fun. Babysitting santa while he vomits in an alley is not. Don't be that santa.
6. Make sure you always pay for your beer and tip the bar staff. We want to be able to do this again so be polite and cultivate the goodwill of the local community.
7. Please pay for your drinks as soon as you get them. Santas get tired of waiting on other santas to clear their tab before being able to move on. This entire adventure should be cash only.
8. “No santa's left behind!” – Don't think only of #1. Santa is not inconsiderate of his fellow santas like that. Pick a few people you know and keep an eye out for them when it's time to move to the next location. If you don't see them, speak up so other santas know to wait a moment. Every santa should have at least 2-3 other santas they look out for and 2-3 that look out for them in turn.
9. Stay with the group. It's not just a case of “the more, the merrier” – Santa is safer with large numbers of fellow santas and what one santa can't achieve (or get away with) is a possibility for 50 or more!
10. Dress up! You don't have to dress exactly like Santa proper. In fact, unusual interpretations of Santa-ness are much appreciated, both by those we bring joy to – as well as your fellow santarchists! Elves, reindeer themes etc. are fine as well!
11. Please remember that this is all about having fun. Most santas like to take their fun with a little alcohol which is fine. What is not fine, however, is getting completely sh#t-faced to the point that santas end up being abusive or violent. Remember that there is no “bail fund” for incarcerated santas and if you cross the line you'll be on your own.
12. Santa doesn't drink & drive and neither should you. If you're going to drink you must make sure that you can get safely home without driving yourself. Check public transport, carpool with a designated sober driver, make arrangements to sleep over at someone's place etc. Organizers sometimes try to coordinate transportation to get santas safely home. Check the message boards and groups for your local SantaCon to find out if this is being done in your area.
13. You MUST address everyone as “Santa.”
14. You SHOULD “ho-ho-ho” like Santa.
15. You OUGHT to give out gifts like Santa.
16. You MIGHT want to drink like Santa
17. Santa doesn't talk to the press. Even “Ho-ho-ho” is too dangerous these days.
18. Santa doesn't get arrested – please read Santa's “four f**ks” (top right) and then read these guidelines one more time.
19. If you have reached this rule, it means you didn't get locked into a loop reading the guidelines over and over again as per the previous rule.
20. Have a VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Related from PDX Pipeline:

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8 Responses to North Portland Santacon (NoPDX Anticon) Date & Information | 2009

  1. Baltar666 November 17, 2009 at 17:07 #

    Thanks for the info! I went to the NoPo Anticon last year and had a blast. It was very chill, partly because of the Hillsboro stunt that sent the WW off course (most of us thought that was hilarious), but also because NoPo is a more laid back neighborhood than downtown. Also there’s plenty of room at the Dancin’ Bare to accommodate all the Santas!

  2. JadedEvan November 18, 2009 at 11:59 #

    This is going to be A LOT of fun

  3. Santa Gas Mask November 19, 2009 at 10:18 #

    This SantaCon™ has been brought to you by Co-OptiTECH. Reminding you that SantaCon™ is a wholesome family event, with guidelines of appropriate behavior, so that everyone may enjoy a little Anarchy© once a year.

    FYD!

  4. Santa November 19, 2009 at 10:48 #

    There is also going to be a full Santa Bar Crawl downtown on the same day. hopefully this will keep the crowds down as well.

  5. santa's medium helper November 19, 2009 at 15:48 #

    This is to Santacon what Hot Topic is to punk. It makes it easier to dress the part, while missing the point entirely.

  6. Santa SAG November 19, 2009 at 22:15 #

    The Santa Applications Group would like to remind any potential Santas that adherence to “rules” 1 through 20 will not be tolerated.

    The Four Fucks are inviolate.

    Ignore this at your own peril.

    Santa SAG

  7. bitter bartender November 25, 2009 at 21:31 #

    It would be great if you let the bars know a week in advance which bars you’re planing on hitting and around what time. It helps us staff properly and stops us from hating you.

  8. Santa December 2, 2009 at 16:56 #

    All bars that are on the route in NoPo have been informed about Santa stopping by with a rough estimated time.

    5 different routes/maps have been created so that there is no bottle necking.

    Maps can be found at:
    nopdxanticon.wordpress.com

    Santa

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