2013 Portland Mini Bike Winter Festival: Craft Night, Valentine’s Day Dance, Brunch, Chariot Wars & More

Right after Mardi Gras and during Valentine’s Day fun comes the 2013 Mini Bike Winter Festival all over Portland-t0wn, but mostly in SE PDX. This is the 9th or 10th year of the festival, and the information on the Zoobomb page is pretty light. Luckily we have info that Gabriel sent us a few years back about all that happens. Some of the events have likely changed (stencil night is now craft night it seems), but it appears most are still in place.

Watch this video to get somewhat of an idea and view these pictures on Flickr. Looks/Sounds like a lot of good fun with a little mayhem thrown in for good measure. Even better, all the events are free!

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Related Portland Events & Info:

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Portland Mini Bike Winter Festival Info:

From Gabriel (2008):

Ladies and Gentlemen, Boys and Girls, Children of all ages and sizes! Step right up and prepare to be amazed and aroused! For years now, in the heart of Cascadia, Portland, Oregon, there has been only one winter bicycle festival in the Pacific Northwest, and that festival is Mini Bike Winter. Created by free-fun-minded individuals as an excuse to to get krunk and wreak some havoc. A combination of thrills, chills, spills, and liquor is just what the doctor ordered to warm the cockles of your heart and in your pants in these dreary winter months. Enjoyed by all walks of life, be it Zoobombers, daily commuters, bike messengers, weekend warriors, or the occasional passer-by, Mini Bike Winter is a free weekend of bike debauchery brought to you by the local bike community, and open to everyone who wants to have a good time. This year, all the stops are being pulled out.

Stencil night, Olympic torch ride, mini bike hill climbs, downhill races, bike-drawn chariot death matches, fashion shows, bike beauty contests, live music, DJ’s, community brunches, death, destruction, mayhem, no-pants dance parties, Olympic-inspired feats of bike strength and stamina, and of course, a little bit of nudity. Ok, so more like a lot of nudity. Mini Bike Winter is a phenomenon that should not be missed, and if you do, you will be ridiculed by all of your friends and family.

BEN HURT Chariot Wars
BEN HURT Chariot Wars be a post-apocalyptic battle for life and limb. YAR! It be a true test of might and stoopidity. Can you ride a little girl’s bike and get hit the most hardest by a padded mace? Or would you rather cheat, (cheating is allowed) and use chicken-shit bombs made from real chicken-shit like the chicken-shit you are?! Or maybe just show up in your underwear and win anyway because you are badass? Hey, it happened last year…

There will be a multitude of chariot tests, from speed to steed, gladiator to flatulator, chugger to bugger, flailing to wailing, and dying. Yes dying, and after that, drinking. Okay, fine, during too.

Just watch the video (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yuf_aUc-wwg) and it will all make sense. Maybe.

Thanks for helping spread the free-fun bike madness!

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From the Zoobomb Official Mini Bike Winter Fest Page:

2013 Portland Mini Bike Winter FestivalMini Bike Winter Festival
Wednesday, February 13 – Saturday February 16, 2013
More Info & Schedule of Events: zoobomb.net/minibikewinter
Need a place to stay? Check here. | Follow Zoobomb for Mini Bike Winter updates: @zoobombpdx

Wednesday February 13th

Open Mini Bike
Velo Clut – 1969 NE 42ND – 7:00PM
Mini Bike Ride leaves at 11:00PM after this event

Thursday February 14th

Craft Night & Valentine’s Dance
Meets at Elsewhere – 1625 SE Woodward – 7:00PM
facebook invite here

Friday February 15th

Dropout Bike Club
Meets at Colonel Summers Park – SE 20th & Belmont – 9:00PM

Saturday February 16th

Brunch
1730 SE 35th Place – Noon
Bring champagne and OJ
Tons of bacon will be on hand

Chariot Wars
Leaves from the brunch spot around 3:00PM

Sprockettes Alley Kitten
Time and location TBA

Big Ass After Party
Ride to the after party from the end of the Sprockettes Alley Kitten
Fashion show theme: Chrome in the moonlight

Sunday February 17th

Mini Bike Winter Olympics
Meets on Colonel Summers Park – SE 20th & Belmont – 2:00PM
Old school mini bike olympics
Continues to the CupCake Challenge on the waterfront

Badass Challenge
Meets at the Zoobomb Pyle – 9:00PM
Can you make it up the hill backwards and become a badass?
First one to the top wins

Tour Da Bomb
Meets at the Zoobomb Pyle – 9:00PM
Mini Bike Bomb, Freak Bike Bomb, Gravity Bike Bomb
Family Bomb

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